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Around SBN: My First Fight: Diego Sanchez

2009 NBA Draft Preview: in Poetry

'Twas the night before the Draft and all through the 'net,

All the creatures are stirring to spew idle threats!

"Jrue won't play here! Or there!" super(?)agent Dan Fegan'll say,

But that tone may change, come 6 o'clock Thursday.

Star-divide

See, draft day is erratic, this - you already know,

Still, always, it's always an incredible show!

Joakim Noah's suit, Randy Foye's many hats,

Getting the buzz from the 4-letter's own Andy Katz!

Where will B-Jennings finally get drafted,

Was going overseas the reason he's shafted?

Who is Jonas Jerebko, where is he from?

Pronouncing his name has made my tongue numb!

Blake will go first, I believe this is fact,

Who's next, however, is why my brain's being wracked:

Hasheem "The Dream", the big straight of ol' UConn,

Ricky Rubio, whose hype makes me get my puke on?

Maybe it's Evans, or Flynn, or the glutton of guards,

It won't be J-Hodge, who once got punched in the nards!

James Harden looks good and solid, but won't be a star,

Will his intangibles be able to take him real far?

Jordan Hill is tall - height's always a hot commodity,

But so was young Kurrgan, and he ended up an Oddity!

DeMar DeRozan has Ridiculous Upside I suppose,

But the true test will be later to see how that upside GROWS.

Stephen Curry is a stud, well, at least he was in college,

But what's he bring to the NBA?  More than his basketball knowledge?

B.J. Mullens, Ty Hansbrough and Austin Daye are all white,

Which will be called the biggest bust of the night? 

Gerald Henderson's from Duke, his real name's Jerome,

Will he be carrying the dreaded 'Dookie's suck in the NBA' syndrome?

DeJuan Blair is round and talented, though his knees seem feeble and weak,

Plus I hated him in college, though not more than 80's wrassler Iron Sheik!

Maynor, Collison, Douglas and Mills, the 2nd tier seems damned,

Still, they're good! pick 'em high - stay free from being scammed.

All in all, the night'll be exciting, with more drama than possible on TNT,

So come right here to Ridiculous Upside, and enjoy it live with me!

We'll be restless in the comments, spewing love and hate galore,

But still, just like the D-League OSLB's, you'll be begging for more!

Let's have fun, and celebrate together this joyous occasion,

Be loud, be proud, and let us all support the glorious SB Nation!

Comment 18 comments  |  2 recs  | 

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Essentially

I’m the man. Are you accusing me of stealing it from somewhere? All me, terrible rhyming and all.

Blogging at RidiculousUpside, where we converse with recently fired mascots.

by Scott Schroeder on Jun 25, 2009 12:12 AM EDT up reply actions  

Ahaha, nice, very nice.

Open thread here tomorrow right? This is gonna be good.

by Rohan on Jun 25, 2009 1:12 AM EDT reply actions  

Open thread indeed

Probably early afternoon – once I get all of my other talking points of the way.

Blogging at RidiculousUpside, where we converse with recently fired mascots.

by Scott Schroeder on Jun 25, 2009 1:26 AM EDT up reply actions  

Check in like two hours, and you’ll see the “twas the night before” thing on Liberty Ballers. Swear to God I started writing it two days ago, and this heading deflated the frick out of me. Darn you Scott! Darn you to heck!

President and Personal Escort of the Gerry McNamara Fan Club

by Michael Levin on Jun 25, 2009 1:20 AM EDT reply actions  

Takes you two days to write?

I wrote this in 20 minutes! As a friend of mine once said, TAFKAMB, “Step yo’ Game Up!” (He inspired me, so I created a dance to the song as well)

Blogging at RidiculousUpside, where we converse with recently fired mascots.

by Scott Schroeder on Jun 25, 2009 1:29 AM EDT up reply actions  

I wanted to use the “Twas the night before” thing, and I couldn’t do that two days in advance. So I wrote some of it, and am currently finishing. It’s pretty epic.

President and Personal Escort of the Gerry McNamara Fan Club

by Michael Levin on Jun 25, 2009 2:18 AM EDT up reply actions  

IF you were a real dancer

You’d know we don’t wear socks. My toes do my talking for me. I was going to go barefoot, but I couldn’t find my toenail trimmer.

Blogging at RidiculousUpside, where we converse with recently fired mascots.

by Scott Schroeder on Jun 25, 2009 10:14 AM EDT up reply actions  

Oops I was wrong....

nothing grosses me out like dirty, long, chippy, yellowed toe nails.

by Aisander D on Jun 25, 2009 10:17 AM EDT up reply actions  

Little bit of dried blood as well under the toenails...

My delicate toes weren’t used to my newfound love of sprintjogwalking a few miles each night.

Blogging at RidiculousUpside, where we converse with recently fired mascots.

by Scott Schroeder on Jun 25, 2009 10:30 AM EDT up reply actions  

Doubtful.

I know you don’t eat yogurt.

Blogging at RidiculousUpside, where we converse with recently fired mascots.

by Scott Schroeder on Jun 25, 2009 12:06 PM EDT up reply actions  

I did this morning

and it was good….until I puked it up.

by Aisander D on Jun 25, 2009 12:59 PM EDT up reply actions  

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